Jamie Doom...

answers his own rhetorical questions.

Advantage Beckham

I have never been called handsome more than in my past five months in China. In fact, I hear it so much that it ceases to mean anything at all to me, even though I agree with the basic statement. However, hands down, the most ludicrous thing I hear is that I look like David Beckham. So far, no less than nine girls and three guys have on different occasions told me that I looked like Beckham. I know the exact number because that kind of absurd thing sticks in my swollen head. Now there are several possible explanations for this. 1.) They are having a little fun by telling the ugly American that he looks like Beckham. Later, when I’m not looking, they will punch each other in the arm and say—“Ha, Beckham. I think he believed us.” 2.) They really think I look like David Beckham. This seems far fetched, but could be a reality, of course with me being the slightly better looking of the two. 3.) I really do look like David Beckham, and my good old “American modesty” is making me block out this glaringly obvious fact.

Let’s take a closer look at this comparison, and see who actually has the advantage.

Beckham barely edges Doom in China 8-2 in this comparison, but don’t tell anybody here in Hainan. The similarities are just too uncanny.

posted by: jmedoom at November 16, 2003 20:29 | link | comments (9) |

Comments:

#1  16 November 2003 - 20:46

 

Nice, Doom... nice. After reading this I finally have the courage to admit that I have always thought you look like Beckham. I'm printing this out and will be posting it on my classroom bulletin board. Doom's legend GROWS! -Rhoades

Anonymous

#2  16 November 2003 - 20:50

 

Which leads me to my next question: what does "Lao-wai" mean? I thank you. - Rhoades

Anonymous

#3  17 November 2003 - 00:39

 

beckham doesn't have a hilarious blog like this... another advantage point for you :D

harriene79

#4  17 November 2003 - 07:08

 

Rhoades, It's about time your class learned something worthwhile. Laowai literally means old foreigner. According to my homie Jiang Li, we all look old. ;-) It has come to simply mean foreigner. So, and stay with me here, "laowai, laowai" means "foreigner, foreigner." Don't be a stranger. -- Doom

jmedoom

#5  17 November 2003 - 22:30

 

Hilarious, man. At least you didn't get compared to Ricky Martin (no, I am not in the slightest Hispanic looking or descent) and named "Superman" in Chinese. But maybe that's revealing too much about myself...

Anonymous

#6  30 November 2003 - 06:56

 

Haha, that was awesome. I say as long as they're not saying you look like DASHAN, you're doing fine. -John p.s. No one ever says I look like Beckham. Dammit.

Anonymous

#7  05 December 2003 - 07:29

 

When I went to China people said I look like Beckham also! My gf (who's Chinese also) took the piss most of the time and kept on putting my hair in a mohawke style whilst saying "Beckham's Brother".

Anonymous

#8  06 December 2003 - 08:22

 

Doom - study harder, bud! You're missing some of the finer points of the language! The "lao" of Laowai *is* the character for "old", but in this context it means "honorable" - not that we are - but it's a difference in English between saying, "This gentleman here" and, "This guy here" when refering to someone within hearing distance.

http://papaver110@yahoo.com

Anonymous

#9  11 December 2003 - 09:06

 

Okay.. maybe not Beckham, how about Legolas in Lord of the Rings, which is almost as hot as Beckham among teenage girls, and as Brit-original as Cucumber and Mermite sandwich... Urr.. mistake, i meant.. Elven King Elrond in the lord of the rings, i always get the elves mixed up you know. It's not bad to look like him, cuz he 1) gets to hug Liv Tyler more times than Aragorn did in the Lord of the Rings ages and 2) Trim his hair to 'blonde and thinning' style, wear IN-looking shades and suits, and kick Keanu Reeve's ass whenever he could in the Matrix future era. Of course, again, you being the better looking of the two. Love your blog, and the MATRIX of Beckam comparison. Here is my thermometer scale: Beckham alone: Quite Hot. Beckham w/ Posh Spice: Between Okay Hot to Quite Hot; Doom in China alone: Quite Hot. Doom in China with Blog: Hot. KFC Spicy Chicken Wing: On Fire Hot.

hellokelly@hotmail.com

Anonymous

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